you can _c o u n t_ on me.

If you need me, call me, no matter where you are, no matter how far.

i love commitment. i live by commitment. my promise is strong. if i tell you i am commited to you, i am wholeheartedly committed to you. I guess this is why i get so upset when people that who i think are committed to me as well let me down. I expect everyone to treat me with the respect that i give them. would you call it being naive or just unlucky? well i would say its a little of both. Do other people view commitment differently than i do? i dont know. what i do know is over and over again people use me as a doormat. When things are convenient for them, commitment is strong. when they feel like it, they follow through with promises and plans. i dont think it bothers people when others let them down. i guess my expectations are higher than that. I have an everlasting commitment with my Savior which for some reason i am fickle about sometimes. For so many of my worldy relationships I am reliable, all of the time. Why can't i give this type of commitment to the Guy who means the most in my life?

on a different note:
i have always disliked the way flowers smell. Last week my great aunt died. We travelled to louisiana for her wake and funeral. to make a long story short, at the cemetery the close family was supposed to walk pass her casket and pick a yellow rose from the flower display which was on the coffin. I still have the rose, and not until almost a week after her death did i smell the rose. This rose smells amazing. coincidence, hardly.